Europa: The Last Battle (2017) review

So today is April 20th.  A day of infamy.  Where everyone is encouraged to roll a joint and smoke it; bake a batch of edibles and eat 'em.  It's international pot day!  It's a day to celebrate! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9Za3EleHYA It's also Hitler's birthday.  The man who has been considered the most vile, racist, fascist, inhumane villain … Continue reading Europa: The Last Battle (2017) review

The Vietnam War: A film by Ken Burns and Lynn Novick (2017) review/critique

Rated: 2.5 / 5 The Vietnam War.  Probably the most controversial war America has ever gotten involved in that has people bickering about it to this day.  Why did we go in there?  Was it ever winnable?  Should we have ever gone in there?  What were our initial intentions, and how did they change?  What … Continue reading The Vietnam War: A film by Ken Burns and Lynn Novick (2017) review/critique

The Power of the Dark Crystal (November 2017) comic review

Rated: 1.5 / 5 So in case you didn't know, The Dark Crystal is my favorite movie of all time.  I love everything about it: the music, the practical effects, the old-school special effects, the simple story, the creatures, the lore, the philosophy, etc.  I love practically everything about that movie.  So I was a … Continue reading The Power of the Dark Crystal (November 2017) comic review

Thor: Ragnarok (2017) review

Rated: 2.5 / 5 I'm not going to lie, I wasn't looking forward to seeing this. "What's that?  What the hell is wrong with you!?  Do you not know how to be entertained!?" you may ask/shout.  To which I would reply, "You sir/madam are too easily entertained."  All the positive reviews this film has been … Continue reading Thor: Ragnarok (2017) review

The Post (2018) review

Rated: 3/5 Intro Warning, this review gets political, makes no apologies about it, and gives no free flying fucks if you disagree with it (unless any of you dare to try having an honest discussion with me). You've been warned. The Post, a movie.  Like how there was a TV series called The Office.  Now … Continue reading The Post (2018) review

Jumanji (1995) and Welcome to the Jungle (2017) dual review

Jumanji is one of my favorite films from the 90s.  It's not just a good kid-flick, but a good film in general.  So when I heard they were making a sequel to it, all I could think was, "Why?"  Then I saw the trailer, and I thought, "WHY!?!?!?" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2QKg5SZ_35I My second thought was, "So this … Continue reading Jumanji (1995) and Welcome to the Jungle (2017) dual review

Star Wars: The Last Jedi review

Rated: 2.5 / 5 So I know what you're thinking.  Will this review contain spoilers?  You bet your ass it will.  I'm gonna spoil the shit out of this movie.  But before I do that, there's a few things I need to get off my chest.  I'll put up a spoiler warning sign when I … Continue reading Star Wars: The Last Jedi review

Brawl in Cell Block 99 review

Rated: 3.5 / 5 Skip-able Intro So you remember when I said, "my next review is going to be on a very controversial film that you’ve probably never heard of that you’ll likely only be able to see on a porn site"?  Well, guess I lied.  I'm putting that on hold for a review or … Continue reading Brawl in Cell Block 99 review

Sonic, and Zombies, and Sexhogs, oh my!

So for those of you who thought I was going to review some classic horror film for the Halloween season, something like John Carpenter's Halloween, or Invasion of the Body Snatchers, or Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street, The Puppet Master, etc, think again.  That's too typical, and you've likely seen those films already … Continue reading Sonic, and Zombies, and Sexhogs, oh my!

Blade Runner 1 and 2049 dual review

Blade Runner rated: 3.5/5 Blade Runner 2049 rated: 3/5 Like the first film, this one ended up bombing at the box office, even though it's ranked at #1 for the weekend (well thank fuck not that many dumbass kids and fucking bronies are giving My Little Pony that much fucking money). Will it gain as … Continue reading Blade Runner 1 and 2049 dual review